It’s time to spend a lot of time doing revising of the picture book text.

Does it Hang Together

Does the story hang together. In such a short story, you can’t mention anything extraneous, at all. If you mention a cat in the first paragraph, the cat needs to be important. Look over the story and list all the elements. Have you used them to weave the story into a tight-knit whole? Cut the extras and use what’s left for maximum effect.

Check the Narrative Arc Again

Even quiet picture books need some kind of arc. Make sure there is a built-in progression of language (good, better, best; bad, worse, worst). Even stories with an event-repetition (think of the three little pigs) has a progression (hay, sticks, bricks).

Cut

I asked you to play with the story and cut it in half. This cut is for real: cut out 1/3 of the words, but keep the story the same.

Of course, that’s arbitrary, maybe cutting 1/4 works. But I’ve often found that cutting 1/3 works quite well.

Micro-cuts

Now, go back and cut another 100 words. Again, it’s an arbitrary number, but it works so well. Think of this as a poem, which is the tightest writing possible. Nothing extra, but nothing left out.

Examples of microcuts and microchanges:

• Instead of a prepositional phrase, use an adjective:
  While you’re at it, replace to be verbs with stronger verbs.
  The tree with the apples was big/The apple tree loomed.
• Unless it’s part of the voice, cut out introductory words:
  While you’re at it, sharpen details:
  While you’re at it, replace to be verbs with stronger verbs:
  Well, it was a nice day/The sun gleamed.
• Replace weak nouns with specific nouns:
  While you’re at it, replace “to be” verbs with stronger verbs:
  The dog barked/The poodle yapped.

Add Word Play

Read Alexis O’Neill’s book, The Recess Queen. It’s a great example of playing with language. It turns a didactic story about bullies into a piece of literature that I’d read to anyone. In fact, when my college freshman students had to write an essay about bullies, I read it to them.

Read the Series

This is part of a series, 30 Days to a Stronger Picture Book. UPDATED Table of Contents!

See Also: 30 Days to a Stronger Novel

Stumble It!